|  Author | Topic: The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E (Read 192 times) |
Luna Lover
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The opera crowd with torches and pitchforks were no match for Erik's fangirls.
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|  | The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E
« Thread Started on Jul 3, 2006, 9:50pm » | ![[Quote]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/buttons/quote.gif) |
Luna’s Talking Game Show!
Announcer: “Now, your host, Luna Lovegood!”
(Luna walks onto the stage and sits down, her wand behind her ear.)
Luna: I would like to introduce our first special guest, the editor of the Quibbler!
(Luna’s father walks into the stage, and sits at one of the booths)
Luna: (Dreamily) is it true that you are the Editor-In-Chief for the Quibbler?
Luna’s Father: Yes.
Luna: Is it also true that you are my father?
Luna’s Father: Yes.
Luna: How has your daughter being a famous talk/game-show host affected you?
Luna’s Father: Well, it has made me more popular at work.
Luna: I hear you are working on a story about Flame-tongued Trenchers. Have you ever witnessed the breeding habits of this reclusive creature?
Luna’s Father: Not yet, but I am confident that I will eventually.
Luna: Our next guest is a famous boy from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Harold Potter, The Boy Who Lived
(Harry Potter enters and sits down)
Luna: (dreamily) is it true that you are the archenemy of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?
Harry: Yes, I suppose so.
Luna: How has this affected your love life?
Harry: (blinks) Uh… Well I guess it has made it hard to um…
Luna: (Suddenly serious) has this kept you from being able to form a permanent relationship with anyone romantically, specifically Ginny Weasley?
Harry: Yes, I suppose so…
Luna: All right then, it is time for Luna Trivia!
(Flashing lights rove all over the stage, then center on Luna. A small booth rises out of the stage, in front of Luna. Harry and Luna’s father’s chairs swing aside and pull behind a small booth with a button on top. Harry looks confused, Luna’s father looks delighted.)
Luna: (holding a card) Now for the trivia portion of the show! Each contestant will receive five points for every question answered correctly! If the contestant guesses the wrong answer, he will lose three points! The first question: In what plant are nargles said to live in?
(Both Harry and Luna’s father hit the buzzer, Luna’s father slightly later.)
Harry: Mistletoe!
Luna: Correct! Five points to Harry! Next question: What is the top speed of a Crumple-Horned Snorkack! (Beep)
Luna’s father: Twenty-five miles per hour!
Luna: Wrong! Three points from the Quibbler’s Editor! Harry! Try you luck.
Harry: Uh… fifteen miles per hour?
Luna: Wrong! Three points from Harry! Mr. Lovegood, try your luck!
Luna’s father: Thirty kilometers per hour!
Luna: Correct! Five points. Harry and Mr. Lovegood, you are tied at two points! Next question: How many people, on average, would see a thestral! Give me a ratio. (Beep)
Luna’s father: One out of five people!
Luna: Sorry, wrong. Harry?
Harry: Uh… Three out of twenty people?
Luna: Wrong. Both of you have negative one point!
Luna’s father: One out of ten people!
Luna: Correct! Final question, worth double points: Name five different animals that may live in a pinecone.
Luna’s father: Gobtruckle, Brossy Replet, Dore Fort, Botly, Kinglon!
Luna: Gobtruckles do not live in pinecones! Harry?
Harry: Brossy Replet, Dore Fort, Botly, Kinglon, and Frothey Dragoon?
Luna: Frothey Dragoons do not exist.
Luna’s father: Nargles live in pinecones also!
Luna: Correct! Harry has negative seven points, reset to zero. Mr. Lovegood has six points! The next round, and more, after this break!
Luna: Now were back! Its time for the endurance round! Both players must attempt to get the golden snitch away from this Moogle!
Moogle: (Walks onto stage) Hi, kupo! If you want the snitch, too bad, kupo!
Luna: (Dreamily) the winner will receive twenty points.
(Harry pulls out his wand, and stands up. Luna’s booth slips into the ground and she retreats to a safe corner. Luna’s father stands up and circles the Moogle. The Moogle drops the snitch, and it buzzes around the Moogle’s head.)
Harry: Accio Firebolt!
(Harry’s broom zips into his hand and he boards it.)
Moogle: Firega, Kupo!
(A giant flame appears around Harry, burning his broom to ashes.)
Harry: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooo-
Luna’s father: Accio Snitch!
(The snitch flies into his hand.)
Luna: Mr. Lovegood wins! Twenty points! You, sir, are the winner! You receive Final Fantasy I-XII!
(The chairs return to their original position, and Luna sits back in her seat. Harry is removed forcibly by some Moogles. Luna’s father sits in his seat and the Moogle sits in Harry’s.)
Moogle: How do you feel, kupo?
Luna’s father: I am feeling well.
Moogle: I hope you do not mind if we ask you some questions about your life, kupo.
Luna’s father: As long as they are not too personal.
Moogle: Well actually-
Luna: (interrupting) How is your job?
Luna’s father: It is a very interesting job. I would not trade for almost anything!
Luna: Does it pay well?
Luna’s father: (faltering) Er… I guess…
Luna: Is it true that you are the editor-in-chief for the quibbler and a field reporter?
Luna’s father: Well yes, actually! I-
Moogle: How would I get to work for your magazine, kupo?
Luna’s father: Um… Well you would have to go to our personnel adviser. I think we have an opening on field reporters.
Luna: What are you working on now?
Luna’s father: (goes on a long-winded explanation about Flame-Tongue trenchers.)
Moogle: (stares) Um, fascinating kupo…
Luna: (With genuine interest) When will you be publishing this story?
Luna’s father: The June issue, probably.
Luna: I cannot wait!
Moogle: Uh-huh, kupo. (Leaves, in the opposite direction from Harry)
Luna: (shrugs) What other articles can we expect in the upcoming February Issue?
Luna’s father: We have this really-
Luna: Oh, it seems we have run out of time!
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kraj
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Posts: 77
| | Re: The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E
« Reply #1 on Jul 4, 2006, 3:45am » | |
You need the Moogle to say kupo more. Otherwise, pretty good, but it could be funnier.
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Luna Lover
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The opera crowd with torches and pitchforks were no match for Erik's fangirls.
Joined: Jul 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 99
Location: Don't look under your bed!
| | Re: The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E
« Reply #2 on Jul 8, 2006, 6:36pm » | |
The Luna Show!
Luna: All right! Today you are in for an elven treat! We have two key figures in the House Elf Liberation movement! First, Dobby, the house-elf!
Dobby: (enters) Hello Miss Lovegood ma’am.
Luna: So Dobby, I hear that you are one of the first House-elves ever to be paid? What is that like?
Dobby: Oh it is amazing Miss Lovegood! Dobby is very happy, even though Dumbledore is not around anymore…
Luna: Please Dobby, call me Luna.
Dobby: Why, Miss Lo- Luna?
Luna: It is better than Loony!
Dobby: Oh… Yes,Dobby heard about you at old home. (Swallows) Dobby’s old master call you- Bad Dobby! (Bangs head against seat).
Luna: Dobby, that seat is for sitting in, not for killing yourself with! Speaking of which, sit down. This is a talk show, not a Palace.
Dobby: Why thank you Miss Luna Ma’am.
Luna: (Dreamily) Now for our second guest, the one, the only, (with disdain) Hermione Granger, the first human to take an active part in elven rights.
Hermione: (enters) Hello Luna, Dobby.
Dobby: (stands up) Miss Granger is the friend of Harry Potter! Sit down in Dobby’s seat, Dobby can stand!
Hermione: Dobby, please, there is-
Luna: Do not, Dobby, Hermione has a chair.
Dobby: Oh… (Sits down) Hello Miss Granger, how is life treating you?
Hermione: Well-
Luna: Hermione, is it true that your attempts to free House-Elves in your fifth year at Hogwarts were unsuccessful?
Hermione: What do you mean, unsuccessful? I freed dozens of House-Elves!
Dobby: Well actually Miss Granger…
Hermione: (Suspiciously) What?
Dobby: I took almost all of those hats, Miss Granger…
Hermione: WHAT?
Luna: Oh, look at the time! It is time to choose; The Contest or Luna Multiple-Choice?
Hermione: I don’t think-
Dobby: Miss Granger may decide which Dobby and Miss Granger will do first!
Hermione: Luna Multiple-Choice!
(The guest’s seats swing outward, behind two booths. A larger booth slides out of the floor in front of Luna.)
Luna: Alright! Multiple-choice questions will appear on your screen. When you know the answer, press the red button! Right answers get five points. Wrong answers will force you to lose three points! This counts towards your final score!
Hermione: (Beeps button) A, b, c, a, b.
Luna: How did you know the answers before I sent you the question?
Hermione: It’s a gift.
Luna: All of those answers are correct… But there is one more! The Final Question! It is worth double points- negative and positive! What is the meaning of life? Select your answer!
Hermione: That is an opinion question! It isn’t fa-
Dobby: (beeps button) Uh… D? 42?
Luna: Correct! Dobby gets ten points!
Hermione: What the-
Luna: We’ll be back after these messages!
Luna: Now we are back! It is time for the contest.
(The first lines of the “Phantom of the Opera” from The Phantom of the Opera musical play on the loudspeakers.)
Luna:(blinks.) Who played that?
Moogle: (Walks out) Sorry, wrong song.
Luna: It is the third CD, not the second!
Moogle: Oh… (Hurries out)
(The “Jeopardy” theme plays.)
Hermione: (With air quotations) What is this “Contest?”
Luna: (Scornfully) Oh, I thought the great Hermione Granger knew everything!
Hermione: I never said-
Dobby: Dobby wishes to know what the contest is if it would not inconvenience Miss Luna at all…
Luna: Right-o. The contest is one of the many activities of the game show portion of our show…
(A strange bouncy music is played. Some Moogles come out and start dancing.)
Luna: We are not sponsored by Disney anymore!
(The Moogles look embarrassed and run out. The music stops.)
Luna: The contest is a small competition between the two contestants. The contestants may be asked to play anything from Wizard’s Chess to two-player Quidditch. Today you will be playing (creepy music plays) WIZARD’S CHESS!
(The two contestant’s chairs swing inward to center stage. A small table with a Wizard’s Chessboard on it rises out of the ground.)
Dobby: Dobby does not find himself worthy of playing Wizard’s Chess against the great Hermione Granger!
Hermione: Uh… Of course, you are Dobby! Sit down. Um… E2 move to E4.
(Hermione Granger has pitiful chess playing skills. Therefore, Dobby quickly decimates her army until she has only one king, one rook, and one bishop. Dobby has only lost one rook and one bishop.)
Hermione: Bishop to F7!
Dobby: Rook to A1!
Luna: Checkmate! Dobby wins! Final scores: Hermione: Twenty, Dobby: 30. Dobby is the winner! You receive a pet chocobo!
Dobby: Where would Dobby keep a chocobo?
Luna: Good point. Give it to Hagrid because he will enjoy it.
Dobby: Miss Luna is correct…
Hermione: The prize was a Chocobo?
Luna: Yes.
Hermione: Oh… Then it is a good thing I lost. I am allergic to large flightless birds.
Luna: Really? That is interesting. Dobby, sit down. Hermione stay there. So Dobby, are you still working at Hogwarts?
Dobby: Yes Miss Luna ma’am.
Hermione: You do not have to call Luna “ma’am” or “miss.”
Dobby: Yes Miss Granger ma’am.
Hermione: Okay.
Luna: Dobby, you are very unusual in that you found more work after you were freed, and you found someone willing to pay you. How do you feel about that?
Dobby: Actually, Dobby feels very privileged to have worked for Dumbledore.
Luna: Yes, the Late Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was a very unusual wizard. Do you think you will continue to be paid by the new Headmaster of Hogwarts?
Dobby: The new Headmaster is rather nice, actually. Dobby is paid the same amount he was when Dumbledore was Headmaster.
Luna: Wow! Time sure flies when you are having fun! Time is up! Goddbye, and enjoy your prize, Dobby and Emma Watson!
Hermione: Emma Watson?
Luna: Tune in next time on The Luna Show!
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kraj
Junior Member
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 77
| | Re: The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E
« Reply #3 on Jul 8, 2006, 6:43pm » | |
Hermione and Emma Watson show off....... oh I can imagine it. That. Would. Be. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And why does Luna hate Hermione so much?
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Luna Lover
Publisher
member is offline
The opera crowd with torches and pitchforks were no match for Erik's fangirls.
Joined: Jul 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 99
Location: Don't look under your bed!
| | Re: The Luna Show! Season 1 Episode 1 rated G/E
« Reply #4 on Jul 9, 2006, 4:38pm » | |
Ravenclaw pride...
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